“You, who have inhabited me in the deepest and most broken place, are
going, going.”

— Anne Sexton, Going Gone 
It’s you at 3am when I had the
recurring nightmare. You talked to me till I fell asleep. You said nothing to
make it better but we were on the phone for an hour. And we were on the phone
for an hour when I said I never wanted to see you again. So you showed up at my
house at 1am. You said nothing about my tears. I said nothing about her perfume
on the collar of your blue shirt with the abstract art.

It’s you when I wouldn’t shed
the layers of youthful immaturity. You stood by me when I stayed out till 7am.
Drunk and stumbling through the crowds, you held my hand and waited for me to
sober up. You wouldn’t kiss me even when I said it was fine. We never talked
about it. You still look at me like I am the only girl in the room. And I still
wonder where you went.

It’s you when I had the panic
attack afraid that I wasn’t good enough for law school. You held me and let me
fall apart. The same way you held me when my grandmother died. You did nothing
to put me back together. You watched me grow in strength. The strength that I
eventually used to leave you. And even when I couldn’t stay away, you watched
me find the resilience to accept that I was better off giving you nothing.

And now it’s you when I am
older and wiser. You seek out my mind and caress it ever so softly. Then you
give me a second in between to blush when you compliment me. We talk for hours
yet I remember every word from your mouth. The mouth that kisses me on the
cheek at the end of the night because you know we have tomorrow.

It’s you, you, you and you. In
a perfect world “you” could be one. But I am content with one. With You!
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  • Reply evelyn karungi April 30, 2013 at 4:02 pm

    I love how deep you are…it's beautiful! You're beautiful. You're so honest, and you let us in on your life…I think you need to start writing for vogue or something grand. You blow me away…spoken like a true fan! Simply beautiful.
    Ps. Whoever the 'you' is…he is so your kryptonite…

  • Reply Nora Kirabo April 30, 2013 at 6:52 pm

    Aaaahhh Evelyn you always know what to say to make me want to write more 🙂
    Thank you, thank you.
    Hahaha he really is my kryptonite, isn't he 🙂

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