Dear Mr 83 mutual friends,
I don’t know you even though Facebook insists that I do. But I will not hesitate to say you have a face of someone I could fall in love with. It’s not just the suit, even though I have an unfair weakness for a man in one. It’s also the ease with which I can pronounce your name, 3 syllables, fit for me to take on. It’s also the way yours is the first face I see every morning when I check my social media notifications, is it fate or is Facebook keen on making us acquainted. From the little I could see from my brief investigation of your profile, you have a firm grasp of English and I have fallen for men with less. Your obvious obsession with sports will be forgiven, because I have an obsession of my own: dogs! We would look great together on Instagram and from what I’ve heard, those are relationship goals. Before I go, I’d like to add that I melted when I saw a picture of your mother you recently uploaded on your page. A man that cherishes his mother is surely a keeper. I hope to send you a friend request one day or vice versa.